Friday, August 12, 2016

"This Little Piggy Should Have Stayed Home" or "How to Lose a Flip Flop in One Easy Step"

From The Archives:
Many of you know our story of job loss after 9/11. Unless you've heard me speak, you might not know the back story of the Kathy Jekyl and Mrs. Hyde during the attempt to sell our two, yes two, homes following said tragedy. If it were a script:


THIS LITTLE PIGGY SHOULD HAVE STAYED HOME
EXT. HOME IN BEAUTIFUL SUBURB OF TULSA - MORNING.


KATHY
helplessly watches as RICHARD her aircraft engineer husband, firmly plants FOR SALE sign in front yard of home they just recently purchased, both with solemn looks on their faces.

RICHARD

I'm sorry! I wish I could make it go away!(CONT'D)
(apologetically)
We should have stayed in ADA. How could we have known two planes flying through buildings in New York, would land in our living room?


INT. ELEGANT FORMAL DINING ROOM OF LARGE HOME IN AN EXCLUSIVE COMMUNITY IN ADA-LATER THAT SAME EVENING.

RICHARD

We've always said we trusted God no matter what. Now, we get a chance to prove it! I should never have bought the new house without this one selling. I never dreamed this could happen to us.

All eyes turn to Kathy to see what her reaction to her husband will be. They see a tear silently fall down the side of her cheek. No other expression or sound.

RICHARD (CONT'D)

We will be pulling up the realtor sign and putting FOR SALE BY OWNER in it's place in the morning. Only, the owner isn't us anymore. We have to give it back to God. He knew this would happen...it's HIS to sell. There's no way we can pay a realtor's fee and sell both houses.

The sense of peace in the room is interupted by the cry of the couples 2 year old son.

The night rolls by the morning sun rises and you hear a phone ringing. The startled couple, still sleeping, jolts awake to scrounge for the phone. Again baby crying in the background.

Cut to- smiles on faces, moving truck in driveway, clearly the Home for sale by owner has been sold and the family is moving today.

Richard and the children drive off behind the moving truck in a Suburban while you see Kathy return to the porch of the house. She is left to do minor clean up before the new owner will arrive in the next scene/next day. She is reflective as music plays and emotions of saying goodbye in each child's room and a pacifier is discovered behind a curtain as she dusts. Tears well, smile remains. Next scene.

MRS. G. NEW HOMEOWNER INSERTING KEY INTO FRONT DOOR CLEARLY BEFORE AGREED TIME TO TRANSFER
OWNERSHIP-DAWN!

KATHY (embarrassed) fumbles for a robe and asks the new owner to wait a moment before entering the master bedroom.

I thought you were not coming until 3:00pm. (CONT'D)
Kathy
I'm not quite ready to go yet.

MRS. G.
(impatiently)
I'll wait!
The silence is deafening as the two women stare at each other awkwardly as Kathy bounces from room to room trying to get the last minute things out of the house.


Kathy
I'm sorry for the garage not being ready yet, I thought I had all day to get it done. I'll hurry and get out of your way.


-------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Okay gang....so you get the idea. We had 2 mortgages, 2 car payments, 4 kids, 1 dog, NO JOB! God allowed our house in Ada to sell one week to the day after Richard was laid off due to 9/11. She bought the house for exactly what we paid for it 2 years earlier. We got all our equity back in cash at closing with no realtor's fee and lived off that money for a few months. God had just done a wonderful act of mercy and provision. It was like watching the feeding of the 5000. But don't you remember, the disciples who just witnessed the miracle, got into a boat and started complaining and doubting Jesus! God just sold our house! So why, overnight, was I now angry, and having a pity party? Well this God-send of a women who provided an answer by purchasing our house the day before, was now on my "DUH" list for not giving me enough time to leave peacefully! So...Plan B!

Okay, I thought to myself, I have the use of Richard's truck, ADA has a landfill...that is plan B. After all, we lived without this stuff for 10 months who will miss it now? Right? Am I Right?

I popped a mint in my mouth, put my hair in a ponytail, stepped into my flip flops and slapped on some deodorant. I gathered the last few things from inside the house which included a full set of pots and pans, random kids toys, slightly forgotten last seasons clothes and the pacifier I found the night before. I headed to the garage as I watched strangers take over the interior of my home...I mean former home.

I gathered everything left in the garage (which was quite a bit) and stuffed it all into hefty garbage bags. Tossing one by one the remains of our life on the hill with matching country club rights, into garbage bags!

My plan was...get the stuff to the dump...get the check to the bank...get out of town..get on with life...SOUNDS GOOD RIGHT?

So I drive into the Dump..which I found by following the gulls....that is until I no longer needed their guidance as my nose was now clearly able to sniff out the rotting garbage land I was approaching. I drove up a steep muddy hill to find a round little man...with only a few teeth and a wheat shock sticking out of his mouth. Harvest time I guess...I THINK I CAN I THINK I CAN...kept racing through my head as I followed his hand signals to direct me to back up into the space closest to his big bulldozer. I could think of a few hand signals for "Goober" as he kept grinnin' at me like "THIS SHOULD BE GOOD". He signaled me to stop...he smiled really big and goofy..and went back to leaning on his bull dozer...UH...HELLO..a little help here! ARE YOU KIDDING ME? Nope! He just watched...and grinned!!!

Okay..I CAN DO THIS...HAD FOUR KIDS ALL C-SECTION...BEEN ON MISSIONS IN EGYPT AND MEXICO...CLEANED FLOODED TOILETS...WIPED UP MANY OCCASIONS OF PROJECTILE VOMIT...I CAN DO THE LANDFILL!

I held my breath, opened the door...took my usual step down from the tall truck...IN FLIP FLOPS (Which I do not recommend)...and...SQUISSSHHHHHHHH! LOST MY FLIP FLOP ON THE FIRST STEP!

As I looked down to try and retrieve my shoe -- I realized the squishy feeling was not just landfill mud. I could see my flip flop buried about three inches down - inside -A PIG CARCASS!
 Remember the Old Testament?
Pork!
WELL..."UNCLEAN...UNCLEAN"!

Let the yelling, screeeeeaaaaammmmmmiiiingg and -yes- I believe-mild CURSING begin! (Give a sister a break....I was standing in a DEAD PIG!)
 This little piggy - should have stayed home!!!

My little piggies...in a little piggy!!!!

NOOOOOOOOOOOOO!

I looked over at "Goober" hoping he would come running to help.
He was too busy -laughing at me!

So- being the tough Chick thst I am, I GRABBED THE SIDE OF THE TRUCK AND PULLED MYSELF INTO THE BED OF THE TRUCK...SHOELESS by now.
NOT HAPPY...NO...DOWN RIGHT FUMING!

 I was Hot! Angry did not touch this temper!
"HOW DARE SOMEONE LEAVE THIS MESS AHEAD OF ME? HOW DARE THAT ROUND LITTLE TOOTHLESS MAN PUT ME HERE...AND LAUGH AT MY LOSS OF SHOE?"

 I started pitching everything in my truck out on to what appeared to be a 20 foot circle of more dead animal parts. Okay, so it was November 1st, Did some weird Halloween ritual take place here the night before or did "GOOBER" and the boys have a Bar-b-q last night?

No matter what the explanation of the dead little piggy, it was disgusting! Again, who would dare do this "TO ME"? I mean, my slightly used toys, my dishes and old clothes...were okay to toss here, but dead animal parts! SERIOUSLY...? Other peoples garbage was horrible! MINE....?????

Oh, Man! Do we do that? Do we catagorize our sin? Their's look like dead pig parts...an abomination to God...but mine? Just a little trash, clean trash at that. No fowl (pun intended) no harm, right?

I mean...other people have murdered, not me- right? Other people have committed adultery...not me -right? Other people have had abortions...not me- right?

So ...my hate, maybe a little gossip listened to in the form of a "prayer request" maybe a little envy here or there, maybe lack of trust, maybe that "STINK-EYE" I had given MRS. G. for coming in too early that morning...not big sins right?

Well, what did God see looking down on the landfill that day?

 TRASH! DEAD TRASH. CLEAN TRASH. ROTTEN TRASH. THEIR TRASH. MY TRASH!

SIN IS SIN....the bible says:

Romans 6:23
For the wages of sin is death, but the gift of God is eternal life in Christ Jesus our Lord.

My ability that day to go from praise to pity party...brought to light my sin condition. I seemed to not grasp Paul's call to live in contentment NO MATTER WHAT OUR CIRCUMSTANCES.

OUCH!!!

Forgiveness was part of my trip to Owasso that night. Begging God for it, and asking Him to allow me to extend it.

I struggled with forgiveness along the way for the next few years as God allowed us to grow through what might have seemed to others as a very unfair situation. I'll tell you...wouldn't trade that time of growth and refining for our entire 401k we spent paying the mortgage, grocery and other bills the next 2 1/2 years. Not even for the 401k plus a million m & m's.

God is GOOD! He knows when to be gentle. He knew how hot the furnace had to be to get rid of some dross in our lives during that time.

I don't want to do it again...but I am ever grateful for God's mercy, forgiveness and faithfulness to us during our rough times. He has forgiven  me of so much anger, pride, sin...I am learning to trust Him NO MATTER WHAT! And someday, no more tears, no more job loss, no more death, no more planes flying through buildings....no more stinkin' pig parts! We will see Him face to face!

Will YOU?

I hope you trust Him. I hope you have accepted Jesus Christ as your Lord and His offer to take your stinkin' trash away and cleanse you.

Just ask Him and He will save you, forgive you of your sins. And you too will see Him one day face to face...when we get...ALL THE WAY HOME.

Just Thinkin',

Kathy












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